Showing posts with label Twilight Zone. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Twilight Zone. Show all posts

Saturday, September 28, 2013

The Twilight Zone – Paternal – Brian Manton



PAGE 21

[2 panels top and bottom 50% of the page]

1.
The living room of a large suburban home. A Christmas tree stands, knocked slightly off axis, in the corner of the room. Peter Abbott, sits on the floor at the back of the room. He cradles a crying baby, using both his arms and legs to shield the child from the rest of the room. He looks traumatised. A large kitchen knife, stained inky blue, lies at his side.

Around the room lie the bodies, five in total, of what can only be described as alien creatures. They rest lifeless in pools of wet blue blood. Vaguely humanoid in form. Deep blue leathery skin, they wear no form of clothing. Long, stick like limbs, each ending in three probing fingers. At every joint, grey fingernail-like growths protrude. Most of the bodies face away from us but the closest lies facing us, its throat cut. In place of eyes, what look like lipless human mouths – all gum and tooth.

Mr. Abbott:  It’s ok son.

2.
Same shot, slightly zoomed out.

In place of the aliens are Peter Abbott’s family. In front, his wife, her throat cut. An expression of horror frozen on her pale face. Behind, the bodies of Mr. Abbott’s four children – two boys, two girls. The blue blood is now bright red.

In place of the baby is a small blue skinned alien creature. Two stalks extend from its “eyes” to masses that have filled Mr. Abbott’s eye sockets. Bloody tears creep down his cheeks.

Mr. Abbott:  They can’t hurt you now.

The "Twilight" Zone - or, My Recurring Nightmare - by R.A. Wonsowski


Layout:
123
456
777

NOTE:  All captions are in the white space below the panel.

Panel 1 - Black panel.

Speech balloon (no tail):  ...oh, man, my head...

CAPTION:  Waking up right now is Raymond Wonsowski.


Panel 2 - Black panel with a few blurry yellow spots.

Speech balloon (no tail):  I think he's comin'round.

Speech balloon (no tail):  Oh, my love...

CAPTION:  A high school Literature teacher and aspiring writer of speculative fiction.


Panel 3 - Out of focus, staring up into a blue, sunny sky through the treetops.

Speech balloon (no tail):  ...cheese is rice, what happened?

Speech balloon (tail left):  That was some nasty fall you took.

Speech balloon (tail right):  My love, I am SO relieved you're ok.

CAPTION:  Like many of the creative who have yet to taste success, he rails against what he considers "celebrated mediocrity".


Panel 4 - Same as Panel 3, but in focus.

Speech balloon (no tail):  Why is everything so bright?

Speech balloon (tail left):  He's not ok, you sack of hammers.  He nearly cracked his head wide open...

CAPTION:  He is genuinely perplexed by the popularity of Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez.  He can't understand how Two and a Half Men hasn't been cancelled yet.


Panel 5 - Same as Panel 4, except I have lifted my hand in front of my eyes.  It is sparkling and glittery.

Speech balloon (no tail):  ...uh, hold on...

Speech balloon (tail left):  Here, mate, what's the last thing you remember?

CAPTION:  The last thing he remembers is standing in front of his 9th grade English class, saying "Stephanie Meyer's moral is that girls have no worth unless they are in self-esteem-destroying relationships with fascinating, yet clingy, effeminate boyfriends who are only attracted to girls young enough to get him arrested."


Panel 6 - Same P.O.V., but now the wide-eyed, emotionless Kristen Stewart "BELLA" is staring flat-faced at me.

Speech balloon (no tail):  ...aww, HELL to the no!

"BELLA":  I am so happy.

"BELLA"  I'm not a real person without a boy to define me...

"BELLA"  ...without you.

CAPTION:  His pronouncement was followed by a series of severe kicks to the head by a gang of angry 15-year-old girls.


Panel 7 - Background, "JACOB BLACK", mopey and shirtless, all tan and abs, and "BELLA", in jeans and a "Team Edward" t-shirt, look on blankly at ME, who is glittering beautifully in the sunshine, vampire fangs bared, on my knees, screaming with despair at God in his Heaven for subjecting me to such a fate.

ME:  nnNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

CAPTION:  Only to find himself regain consciousness in...the "Twilight" Zone.

Hasta la vista,  Mr. Hill.  You will be missed.

Friday, September 27, 2013

The Twilight Zone - All The Time In The World - Niel Jacoby

Panel 1: Steven, a research scientist, walks out of his laboratory after another grueling day. We can see the flask in his pants pocket and the bags under his eyes.

Caption: IMAGINE IF YOU WILL, A MAN WHOSE DAILY LIFE IS ONE EMBARRASSMENT AFTER ANOTHER. A JOB HE HATES, A FAMILY HE BARELY KNOWS, AND NO TIME BETWEEN THE TWO FOR HIMSELF.

Panel 2: Steven walks outside into the city streets to see the world completely frozen. People stuck in place, cars in midair, water still in mid-ripple, etc.

Caption: BUT STEVEN GREY HAS ALL THE TIME HE MAY EVER NEED.

Panel 3: Steven looks around, with a hint of a smile on his face.

Caption: HE'S GOT THE WHOLE WORLD ALL TO HIMSELF.

Thursday, September 26, 2013

The Twilight Zone - Mr. Average - J.D. Coughlan


Panel 1: Mid-shot of Denis Pierce, this segment's main character. He is, by all appearances, perfectly average. He is sitting at his breakfast table, staring blankly ahead, almost at us, eating his cereal. He wears an average blue suit and tie.

(Note: The Narrator's dialogue is all in caption boxes.)

NARRATOR: You are now entering the realm of the unusual; the strange. But observe, if you will, the lack of strangeness around Denis Pierce. The average American man.

Panel 2: Denis at his desk at work -- an office. He sits typing, same blank expression. His coworkers around him have similar expressions.

NARRATOR: He has an average job.

Panel 3: Denis sits on the couch in his den, his wife, son and daughter around him, watching TV. They also look average and have the same blank expressions. Denis is now dressed more casually, but a lot like Mr. Rogers, or your typical 1950s American TV dad.

NARRATOR: An average family.

Panel 4: A backyard barbecue, again with Denis at the centre, expressionlessly cooking burgers. He is surrounded by similar men.

NARRATOR: Average friends.

Panel 5: Same scene, closer on Denis, head and shoulders.

NARRATOR: But, you see, there is something special about Denis.

NARRATOR: He is the first carrier for something very unique.

Panel 6: Close up on Denis's blank face, staring right at us.

NARRATOR: Ask yourself, dear reader...

NARRATOR: What if "average" were contagious?

END OF PAGE

The Twilight Zone – Waiting – Shaun Richens.


PAGE ONE – 6 PANELS.

1.1
The interior of a clean yet somewhat homely doctors waiting room. Sunlight shines in through the window, as patients wait in that awkward silence that comes as part of the atmosphere of a doctor’s practise. One of these patients is MAGGIE.

She is an attractive young woman, but she is clearly lacking in confidence. Her outfit feminine but understated. She sits with a quiet grace about herself. Her hands in her lap, she pulls at a loose thread in her knitted cardigan.

A middle aged Indian man sits next Maggie.

NURSE (OFF PANEL):
Mr Patel the Doctor is ready for you.

1.2
Repeat panel. However the Indian man has gone and now a young family, Mum, dad and two-year-old daughter Ellie sit on the other side of Maggie. Maggie’s hair looks longer and she seems a little tired.

NURSE (OFF PANEL):
Did you want to bring little Ellie in now? We are ready for her.

1.3
Repeat panel. Now the young family have left. Two young men sit together heads close as they chat and smile at one and other.

Maggie looks ten years old. Wrinkles creep up next to her sweet little smile and her long hair is now streaked with silvery grey sparkles.

NURSE (OFF PANEL):
Mr Quinn can follow me this way.

1.4
Repeat panel. The two young men are now done. Maggie is an old woman, her long hair is all white, her face a map of wrinkles. Her knitted cardigan rests over her knees. Her head is down her eyes closed tight. No one else is waiting to go in.

NO COPY.

1.5
Repeat panel, but pull in closer on Maggie. A pregnant woman rests her hand on Maggie’s shoulder. We can’t see the pregnant woman’s face as it is off panel. Her baby bump is massive; she looks like she is due any day now.

PREGNANT WOMAN:
Excuse me madam do you mind if I go in ahead of you?

PREGNANT WOMAN:
My wee princess is being rather playful today.

1.6
Small panel. Close on the pregnant woman’s hand on Maggie’s shoulder.

PREGNANT WOMAN:
Are you ok?




Just want to say a huge farewell to Mr Dan Hill on his last week writing with us here at Thoughtballoons. You’re one hell of a writer and an even better bloke. You’ll be very missed around these parts, but I can’t wait to read all the many projects I know you’re cooking up.

 I wish you all the very best for future mate. Don’t be a stranger.  

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

The Twilight Zone – Zoned Out – MK Stangeland Jr.


(9 Panels)

Panel 1: A young man – JIMMY – is sitting in front of a TV. He’s wearing a TWILIGHT ZONE shirt.

NARRATION: Meet Jimmy – a man with a love for a certain TV show. But he’s about to learn that the truth of this TV show might not be what he might expect as he finds himself in – The Twilight Zone!

Panel 2: JIMMY is wide-eyed with shock and surprise as what he’s seeing on his TV isn’t at all what he expected.

TV: Previously on The Twilight Zone, our heroes found themselves caught in the middle as Werewolves and Vampires came to the brink of war!

Panel 3: Close-up on JIMMY’s face as he shouts in horror.

JIMMY: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

Panel 4: JIMMY sits up as he wakes up from what was seemingly a nightmare. However, it’s quite clear that something is very wrong because as it so happens, JIMMY looks like a pony in the style of MY LITTLE PONY: FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC, and is located inside of TWILIGHT SPARKLE’s library treehouse.

JIMMY: Whew, what a nightmare!

Panel 5: JIMMY has another look of shock on his face as he looks to see TWILIGHT SPARKLE standing nearby, who looks a tad confused by how JIMMY is acting.

TWILIGHT SPARKLE (1): What was a nightmare.

JIMMY (1): …

JIMMY (2): What? Where am I?

TWILIGHT SPARKLE (2): My Treehouse Library?

JIMMY (3): Who are you?

TWILIGHT SPARKLE (3): Twilight Sparkle?

Panel 6: Another close-up on JIMMY as he yells in horror at his prediciment.

JIMMY: AAAAAAAAA…

Panel 7: JIMMY, in a bed, sit up as he yet again wakes up.

JIMMY: …HHHHHHHHH!

Panel 8: Distance panel, showing JIMMY sitting in a bed that is located practically in the middle of nowhere, a wilderness that is lit by an ever setting sun, keeping the whole place permanently lit in twilight.

JIMMY: …

Panel 9: Match to PANEL 8.

JIMMY: What?

(END PAGE)

Monday, September 23, 2013

The Twilight Zone - Inconceivable - Grant McLaughlin

1 - Establishing shot of the Capitol Building in Washington D.C.  It's a beautiful day.  A day for Truth, Justice, and the American Way.

CAPTION: Imagine, if you will, a political arena where elected officials are neither interested in partisan bickering nor in the wider concerns of big business lobbyists.

2 - Interior of the House of Representatives.  A debate is in full swing, with one politician standing, in the midst of finishing their speech.  Everyone else on-panel seems to be giving their full attention, listening to every word offered.

CAPTION: A place where the primary goal lies instead in bringing together differing views and beliefs in an ongoing effort to determine and enact the best policy for the nation as a whole.

REPRESENTATIVE: ...which is why I believe this is the best course of action available to us at the moment.

3 - The debate now over, another politician comes over to speak with the interlocutor from the previous panel.  The second person shakes the first's hand enthusiastically.  Both are quite cordial to the other.

CAPTION: Where citizens can rest assured that debate is informed, nuanced, and most of all, open-minded.

SECOND REPRESENTATIVE: That was excellent.  I'd never considered the question from that persp--

OFF-PANEL VOICE (interrupting loudly): CUT!

4 - Similar scene as panel 3, but pulled out slightly to reveal that the whole thing is taking place on a film set.  It is not an episode of The Twilight Zone but the filming of one.  Lights, cameramen, the director, and various other workers and instruments are set up just beyond the border of what was the previous panel.  The two politicians / actors are in a similar position, but look towards the director, annoyed.  The director is mighty frustrated, shouting at everyone.

DIRECTOR (1): We're supposed to be telling stories that are at least somewhat credible.

DIRECTOR (2): I don't know how this one got approved, but it will never fly.

5 - Focus on the director, who is now motioning to everyone that they're giving up on this story.

DIRECTOR (1): Forget it.  Let's nix this and go with that family of Frankensteins script.

DIRECTOR (2) (quietly): ...at least that one's plausible.

The Twilight Zone - The End of the Beginning - Ben Rosenthal

Twilight Zone

1. Dan Hill stands at a door, hand on the handle. On the door are the words "You are now leaving Thought Balloons". The door has just been pushed open, with Dan looking back over his shoulder with a sigh.

CAPTION (Narrator)
Picture this, if you will. A talented writer looks to leave behind his past to embrace his future.


DAN
*Sigh*


2. Reverse panel of the same door with Dan stepping through it, the door is closing behind him. Dan looks confused and worried. His body is obscuring text on the door.

DAN
What? No.


3. Ben Rosenthal is sitting at a desk, a evil smirk on his face. Behind him is the door Dan just exited/is coming through (he is trapped in a loop).

BEN
You didn't think leaving would be that easy, did you?


4. Back to Dan who is looking behind him as the door slams shut. We can see the text now which reads "Welcome to Thought Balloons".

DAN
No.

5. Dan is on his knees, looking up to the sky with hands clenched in despair.

DAN
NOOOOOOOOOO!

BEN (off panel)
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Twilight Zone -Roots -Dan Hill

PAGE TWENTY TWO

22.1
CLOSE UP on a FOOD CRATE swaying slightly, suspended by a pulley and rope (/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Crate.webp).

    CAPTION:    “He knows now. He knows how it’s all supposed to play out.”

22.2
A close up on MELVIN LEVY, a goofy but confident Jewish kid in his early twenties. He’s wearing a US ARMY uniform. Around him we can see palm trees and a blue sky. Levy is performing some kind of skit, doing an impression of an officer and pulling a funny face.

We’re on the island of Leyte, circa 1944.

    CAPTION:    “This is the 425th iteration of this event. This isn’t some time loop, paradox or alternate dimension.”

22.3
We pan around to see Levy’s audience, a crowd of laughing US ARMY TROOPS, falling about themselves with laughter.

A young, dark haired and intense-looking PRIVATE in the audience is the only one not laughing.

    CAPTION:    “These are the young privates nightmares, nightmares he’s had every day since Melvin Levy told his last joke.”

22.4
Back on the CRATE as it falls free of the rope holding it.

    CAPTION:    “He’s seen every possible way this event could play out. But he knows he’s powerless to stop it from happening the way it did.”

   CAPTION:    “This is how it was supposed to be.”

22.5
We CUT TO a shot of ROD SERLING talking to us/camera, dressed in his trademark suit and tie.  Behind him we can see Leyte and the palm trees as all of the SOLDIERS rush forward, crowding around the decapitated corpse of Melvin Levy.

The dark haired and intense-looking PRIVATE remains exactly where he is.

    CAPTION:    “These are Private Serling’s first steps…”

22.6
Push in on SERLING.

    CAPTION:    “...into the Twilight Zone.”

Why Twilight Zone?

So, depending where this entry falls in the Thought Balloons space-time continuum it might be apparent that this here is my final week here at Thought Balloons. If this hasn’t been revealed beforehand, it has now. There’s a lot I could say, but I only have so much room so I’m going to paraphrase from the email I sent to Ben explaining my decision.

I knew that this day would come sooner or later, I just didn’t think it would be this soon. With Curriculum, my column at The Weekly Crisis, looking for work in a city the other side of the country, an editing gig and getting my own projects off the ground I found it increasingly hard to carve out time to put quality scripts out on a consistent basis for Thought Balloons. I have no desire to put out substandard scripts for a site I value and treasure so much. Something has to give, and in this instance it’s unfortunate that it has to be Thought Balloons.

I’ve valued my time at the site highly. It’s taught me so much about my own process, what I’m capable of, as well as introducing me to a group of talented writers I’m honoured to have been a part of and who I can proudly call friends.

This wasn’t an easy choice to make, but one that had a certain sense of inevitability about it.
And so to my pick.

Twilight Zone.

I have waxed lyrical on Twitter, Tumblr and to anyone who will listen about my love for this show. Even now, decades after its creation ,the show holds up as an example of clever, crisp and engaging entertainment. Its creator Rod Serling is amongst my literary heroes and his impact on popular culture cannot be stated enough. The show also attracted many other writing heavyweights such as Charles Beaumont, Richard Matheson and Ray Bradbury.

Any conceivable genre could be played with (westerns, sci-fi, drama, horror), stretched, poked and prodded into something new. The settings and characters could be historical or fantastical but, like all good drama, they spoke to something we could relate to. This could be the small town paranoia of The Monsters From Maple Street, the yearning for youth and nostalgia explored in Walking Distance or the notion of beauty in Eye of the Beholder.

Twilight Zone could be anything.

The comics of the same name are a mixed bag, alternating from original content to adaptations of episodes gone by. I’ll admit the connection this week is tenuous. But, as it’s my last week, hopefully my fellow TB-er’s (and those of you at home) will indulge me one last time and come up with some fantastic one page strips.

Okay, Rod, play me out…

“You unlock this door with the key of imagination. Beyond it is another dimension— a dimension of sound, a dimension of sight, a dimension of mind. You’re moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas. You’ve just crossed over into the Twilight Zone.”